So, i broke

I'm writing one of those thingies.

One. You're amazing, and i miss you and i can get so mad at you b/c you never listen, but then again, you listen to more of what matters from me than any one else in my life. At some point, we became supper close, and i'm okay with that. God blessed me in 9th grade, even if i didn't know it then.

Two. I missed you, but now we're back. You know me very well. We need to get together and watch some 80's movies some day, it'll be fun, and i promise we'll get some bistro. And i'm going to make you somthing out of a shirt if it kills me.

Three. I'm sorry for you, b/c i know that hurts, but i think it was necessary, and i think it's for the best, and I really hope you come friday and i really hope you get past this and you two can be friends.

Four. I miss you to, come back damnit! We need to have a night out again. I miss our wonderful rides with screaming music and laughing at everyone who's ever hurt us b/c they will never experience a night like those nights that we have sooo often. I am blessed to be your friend.

Five. We don't talk anymore, you don't even read this, and i hate the former! You were my bestfriend for 10 years and now you've just faded from my life, you didn't even call me on my birthday party, and i'm sure if i asked you to come friday, you'd just say you were busy, or you had to work, or you'd even come and bring that kill joy, and she'd just be a bitch and you'd have to leave early. I'm sorry that we ended up like this. really really sorry.

Six. Bestfriend! you've ment a lot to me for the past three weeks. You've helped me through prob. more than you know you have. Thank you. I give you a lot of crap, but i really do love you, and everything about you. If you were any different, life wouldn't be as fun. I'm glad we finally got to have our smoke date.

Seven. You made life interesting, really interesting. You even got me grounded. Well, thank you for that. You mean a lot to me, even if we've been out of touch. and you look better than ever right now, and i'm glad i can say.....well you know what i can say, haha. We hit a bump a while a go, and i'm glad we could get passed it. I'll have to thank niqui one day.

Eight. i have no clue why i'm just now getting to you, but...well, i love you. We'll always be friends. We'll always be bestfriends. and some day, we'll beable to see eachother twice in one month. haha. Lets get together and worship some day?

Nine. You came as a suprise this year. i've known you for about 7 months now, and you're amazing. I'm excited to see who you'll become in the next year. and i love that you're just down the road from me (kinda) and i can call you if i ever need you. I'm glad that we got to sneak out that night. it was a lot of fun. and we got to help someone. wooo. You're always ready to help, and i love that about you.

So about this depressing conversation

let's not let it ruin our faith, just accept that God is unjust and be mad about it

So, that's basically what Shack was like, and i don't think i liked it very much. Basically, we talked about how life isn't fair and that God isn't just. Well, actually God is just, b/c Who are WE to say what is just?! We are just humans, mortals, just because God made us in His Image, doesn't mean that we have to power to say what is just. Our concept of justice is set by our society and what we interpret from the Bible. Well guys, we're not perfect we don't always interpret it right, and God is the only one fit to say what is just and what is not. He is the Ultimate, the Alpha, the Omega, our Creator, THE Creator. He knows what is just, He knows what is happening, and it is not fair for us to question that. I mean, okay so we're not going to hell for questioning god, but i mean, It's not okay to just get mad about it and talk in circles about it, dwelling on it. Okay, get mad, but then get over it and just let Him do his work. Accept, not that God is unjust, but that God knows what justice is, and have faith that He is carrying it out. It does not sit well with me that no one at Sunday Night Shack seemed to grasp this, even me, i didn't really think about this until late last night. I mean, life's not fair, we will not always reap what we sow in this life, on earth. But in the after life, we will get what we deserve. So bad things happen to good people, and good things happen to bad people, THAT'S OKAY! b/c in the end, God will keep his promise to us, and will judge us in the end. Thank God that He has not taken it up to give you what you deserve, b/c if so, You'd prob. be toast, you'd be a nice crispy spot on the ground/floor/road/bed/hallway/where ever you were.
Rant over.

God bless, Good night.
Love,

<3

I've never seen good intentions set a man free

This girl is amazning, her and i hung out yesterday and it was a lot of fun. And she's going to be the first woman i have during my 18th birthday party. the first of 18 may i add, haha. We went to columbia and she bought be icecream for my birthday, woot! and we went to five points and interacted with drunk guys looking for highschool girls and then we went to shack. Shack was amazing, the disccusion was a little depressing but it's okay, and then we went out for chinese! and i had crab legs and acted like a barbarian, all the while she was trying to get some guy to leave her alone via text, haha. Then we went to the old mill for no reason at all, and hung out in the sketchy backroom and stared at a brick wall for about 10 minutes........yeah....
then we went to my house and hung out and talked and went for a walk where i told her about my plan to subdue here with cloraphorm(Sp?). then we walked back to my house and she eventually went home. it was a fun night.
Thankyouhayleynelson!

Grayson is afraid that the blogging world is dying.
This is proof it's not.
See, i'm blogging.

Woo the fourth.

I felt like shit for most of the day. Thank GOD! for asprin and water. Buuut i finally got a nap and i feel much better. i want to go get some fireworks tho...if i don't get any, i'm gonna be pissed! (fireworks that is)
This weeks as been really fun! i think i finally know what tattoo i want....but more imprortantly, i have to talk to my Dad about my piercing....eck! this will be fun. myabe he'll finally realize that it's somthing that he can't stop and that it's really not that bad. I hope so anyways.
God Bless,
Love.
<3

Birthday.

So....I'm 18, this is good and bad. Bad b/c temptations just doubled, and good b/c i'm freaking 18. This gives me a lot of freedoms and hopefully some leeway with my parents.
Went to Miyo's with some of my bestfriends, and had a blast! The sushi was amazing and the cheesecake was the best thing ever. The jasmine tea taste like you're drinking the sent of jasmine. Blackberry sage tea comes in a really cool bottle, and we had fun taking pictures, and my little cousin says the best things EVER! Our waiter had an amazing peircing and i went to the mall and retainers are only like 5 bucks! wooo. and the chick told me that cartledge peircings heal in like two months, and i mean..she had 6, so i beleive her, haha.
"I'm gonna eat the crap out of you"-Jordan, my 10 year old cousin, talking to Courtney, my 6 yearold bestfriend (she's actually 18). Yikes.
I got 5 books, which are all amazing, i'm getting 6th from courtney eventually, and i got a sketch book from susan, who is pressing me to draw more. Go susan. This is my potentially my last post for a week, when i post next, it may be about how bad my ear hurts. haha
I love all of you who came today, and all of you who couldn't come but wanted too!

Denholm Davis got me the Dr. Seuss book Happy Birthday. I love him.

God Bless,
Love.
<3

Sunday night shack.

So, i've figured out why i stopped producing art. I took God out of my art. This shouldn't have ever happened. God is the reason i can make art, and the reason i love doing it. The best things i have ever made have been related to God, so i don't know why i stopped making it have somthing to do with Him?
Usually when i worship with music, i sing and i clap, and stand and dance-ish. So yeah, i didn't do that yesterday, i just drew in my journal.
A few things have been coming up a lot during shack, like every week. Child like Faith, Selflessness, and Fear. Last night we talked about death and sorrow, and how sorrow is neccesary, but not better than happiness. I really loved talking about this, b/c i'm a firm believer in God always having somthing amazing waiting for us, and that to get it, we have to go through all the negative and sorrow and pain.
If this makes sense you to, you're amazing.
<3