make me or break me, just don't hold on to me.

So, i'm officially going through a time when i have to choose, what i'm going to focus on. Either this trivial stuff that i stupidly and selfishly think involves me (it doesn't fyi), or i can focus on God, and his plan for me, which does have somthing to do with me. Sounds real easy right..well most of you prob. know that it's not. I've always had a habit of internalizing things, or making other peoples problems, mine. and its not a " i want attention " thing, it's more like a...."i have to help them thing", i feel like i have to help everyone, and i do want to help everyone, but it's so hard for me to go "NO, denton, you need to help your self first, b/c if you dont' know how to fix what you've broken, how can you help them fix what they've broken, or what they've had broken"
So, i guess this is me, hoping that i'll choose to focus on God...this is me typing as i fight myself at this moment, i want to save this person, and yell at this girl, and call this guy stupid, and tell this guy that it's gonna be alright, and yell that this other guy to stay out of her life, and Save this girl (as in christians get Saved), and just meet one girl who would like to date me, and try to make my family's life easier, all at once. But really, i need to just....pray i guess, and Focus on God, and Listen to God. so guys and gals, that's what i'm gonna do.
If you read/understood all or any of this, thank you for caring and mad props to you.
God bless,
Love.
<3

It's nothing to cry about..

b/c we'll see eachother soon,
in the blackest of blues

So, i've decided that i'm not going to be that bored ever again this summer. I'm goingto have stuff to do all the time, b/c it's not right for my little cousin to be bored like that either. And the fact that he will sit for hours and play violent stick games, does not put me at ease.
So, anyways, Me and him are sharing a bed, and he kicked and hit and kneed me alllllll night. I actually got kneed in the ribs by a sleeping ten year old. I think it's like a cudle/comfort thing b/c he get's real close to you in his sleep, but...geeze...i'm gonna look like i get abused.
And everyone who hasn't ment my cousin, don't worry you will, and you'll think he's adorable. hahaha
God bless,
Love.
<3

So, i'm real bored.....

I've been sitting at my house all morning, very very very bored. I feel really bad, b/c my little cousin is here, and he's pretty bored too, but i don't really know what to do, b/c i don't have any gas....so we can't go anywhere, and ther is NOTHING to do at my house..... hm...

before graduation

So, i'm sitting here in my living room before graduation, and i don't really know how to feel. i'm actually kind of blank. about grad anyways, i feel sorry for my younger cousin britt, b/c she has a very nast splinter in her foot, and happy b/c my cousin jordan is going to stay with us for the month of june, and kinda mad b/c my aunt's smoke is blowing on me.

But about graduation, i don't know. i mean i feel scared, but scared that i might cry a lot, not really scared about my life, i guess me having the faith i do, i just know God will carry me through as long as i let Him and have faith in Him.
I feel happy b/c i'm going through this with my friends, the people that have been there for me for the past four years or more. I'm happy that they made it too, and that we're all going places. But besides those two feelings i can't really say anything more. It's weird, i'm normally teaming with emotions, but today, before taking one of the biggest steps i'll ever have to take in this game called life, i feel almost nothing, and nothing related to this actual event.
To all of my friends: Thank You and Good Luck, i know we'll all go So far, and that God will take care of all of us, and that we'll eventually meet up again.

God Bless,

Love.

<3

Family-New computer-Work.

So yesterday was amazing, b/c I got to go to grouchos with some little friends, i say little b/c everyone there was a sophmore. it was last day for lexington and WK so EVERYONE was there and it was packed like a can of little fish. but it was good food and really fun. then we went to the park which was good, i wish i could have stayed for longer but i had to go pick up cass, which was also fun. Just being around him is fun, he's so freaking happy and just really exciting all the time, it's amazing. We went to the wired bean and talked to megan G and talked about how I think people of OTHER ethnicities are better looking than white people. it was cool, then becca hupp came in and that was weird, b/c she was getting trained like i was monday. it seems like it was more than just three days ago......
I GOT MY NEW COMPUTER!!!!!!!!! this is exciting! i have a toshiba who's name is Eve, and she's beautiful!
I have to go to work at 5 today b/c megan always schedules danielle two hours before me....and i'm driving, we car pull for gass purposses..did i spell that last word right..prob. not. but
Family is coming in today! at one, so i should prob. be cleaning more or somthing...not sitting on my computer in my boxers...oh well, i'll get started at 11....
God bless,
Love.
<3

Second day at the Bean

Hahaha, so i wasn't suppose to work until thursday,
buuut Amber Jade called in, so Megan G asked me if I wanted to work. What I heard was "do you want to make four hours of money?" so of course i said "yes." It was fun tho, me and danielle work well together.
I am so very tired tho, and my hands smell like soap, sanitizer, and bleach! wooot! i feel So sexy right now, i mean, you don't even know. And now, i'm watching Maxim's Top 100, so i'ma go!

oh, and i get to see my favorite meagan porter ever tomorrow!

God bless,

Love.

<3

First Day at the Bean

It was....hectic at first.
Megan was having a rough day, and i walk in and behind me, like 5 customers come in. So i get to the register and have to start ringing ppl up. So for about 15 minutes, i'm ringing people up and megan is making drinks. Thats how my day started.
And then Ms. Patty came in...Enough said there.
After that it was good. i got trained on making Hot drinks, Iced drinks, Frios, Smoothies, Bagel sandwitches, and how to re-stock.
It was amazing, all of my shots tonight were hockey pucks...all of them! that's amazing for me..i mean, it's my first day, and they were really good. As an employee of a coffee shop, this makes me feel accomplished, and let's me know that i'm not going to be horrile at this job like i was scared.
So this has been a very good first day. Thank God for my job.
I love the wired bean, and my legs are very tired.
God Bless,
Love,
<3
oh yeah, and I burnt myself, My thumb slipped when i was handdleing a hot pan. but it's fine.